I never separate my blacks and whites
instead I throw them into this machine together
until my whites manifest into an ugly grey
until my insecurities transforms itself into a kind of joke
as I watch my friendship whirl around and cleanse themselves,
any previous pesty comment that was made by me is now, forgiven.
any stain I created is now washed away
so long as I make people laugh every friendship stays solid
nobody can take my darkness and depression 24/7
nobody wants an all-black wardrobe but grey can also be tolerable
even if that's my reality,
they'd rather live this friendship we have through a glass shield
so close but so separated
like we can almost connect
but I can't not wear these clothes until it is clean
until it is too late
until my whole wardrobe is blacks and Greys you silently condemn my midnight fashion pieces long evening gown
It's too harsh on your eyes my grey is your light
I mean mine
I mean maybe my jokes aren't jokes
I don't know how to cope so I dress for you to like me
because that's better than going through life empty